We had a round table growing up where the six of us sat for family dinners. Four kids plus our parents. And I remember discussing this years ago with my parents, who said they liked the round table as it created an environment in which each of us felt that we could be equal participants in our discussions.
Plus, it did not set up anyone as the “head” of the family nor did it create a potentially adversarial atmosphere where you were physically opposite each other. King Arthur had a round table for his knights, right?
Of course, my dad was fond of saying that he was a “benevolent dictator.” But in our conversations and debates– and we had a bunch – he ensured we all participated.
I was reminded of this recently when I saw a video of Harvard Law and Business Professor Guhan Subramanian describing his facilitation of a negotiation between corporate board members. The board was equally split on a major issue.
Apparently, the board was set to meet in a law firm conference room at a long rectangular table. And the board members were given name cards as they arrived and asked to grab a seat.
You probably know what happened next. The board members on one side of the issue all sat on one side – and the other side grabbed the opposing seats.
This was highly counterproductive from a negotiation perspective.
What should have been done?
Strategically evaluated who should sit where based on the environment and messages you want to send, in advance. Then preset the name cards.
What factors should you consider?
· Your relationship-oriented goal.
Does your negotiation goal include a future working relationship with your counterpart? If yes, set up a collaborative environment. Perhaps sit everyone side-by-side, where they can work together and suggest revisions to documents or jointly work on one computer.
Of course, consider side-by-side even if it’s likely adversarial and you don’t care about the relationship. It might be easier to find the sweet spot if you’re not physically in an us vs. them setting.
By contrast, divorcing parties should not sit next to each other if the dispute includes abuse or infidelity allegations. More physical separation may be better, especially if it involves high emotions and might escalate out of control.
· The parties’ negotiation roles.
Who will take the lead in the negotiation? Should they sit at the head of the table – signaling “I am in charge and the decision-maker,” or in the middle of their team, suggesting more a team effort? Who should sit next to each other (a significant consideration for future relationship purposes)?
Where should your financial expert sit (perhaps next to the lead if they will need at-the-table advice)? What about legal counsel, especially if the negotiation involves terms and conditions? Will someone be taking notes and silently observing, analyzing everyone’s body language and non-verbal signals?
Consider these roles in determining where everyone should sit.
· Physical sightlines and hearing.
When I do training programs – and this is a negotiation with my attendees as we have mutual interests to satisfy – I send my clients a room setup diagram in advance that lays out where and how folks should sit.
Overall, I want to be as physically close to everyone as reasonably possible, so prefer the midpoint of a room versus one end or another. This creates a more interactive and friendly atmosphere.
Everyone also has better sightlines and can more easily hear, too. Sightlines can be crucial.
Years ago, I did advance work for President Bill Clinton’s White House, and I recall helping organize the Summit of the Americas in Miami. This is an event with the heads of state of countries in North, South, and Central America plus the Caribbean.
We literally commissioned the building of a huge round table for the meeting/negotiation of all the heads of state. Not surprisingly, everyone had a specific place to sit
Latz’s Lesson: Where you sit at the negotiation table – plus the shape of the table – can positively or negatively impact your ability to get the deal done.
* Marty Latz is the founder of Latz Negotiation, a national negotiation training and consulting company that helps individuals and organizations achieve better results with best practices based on the experts’ research. He can be reached at 480.951.3222 or Marty@LatzNegotiation.com.