“How can we more effectively negotiate with these aggressive lawyers on the other side? They argue over every issue. I generally know how to deal with them, but is there a specific move or tactic you would recommend?”
This question, posed by a potential client this week, points to a regular negotiation challenge many of us face. Here are two suggestions (the first strategic and the second tactical).
1. Apply this five-step strategic process
This has been a challenge for negotiators for years. In fact, I wrote a column addressing this general issue way back in 2007: “Effective Strategies for Dealing with Difficult People.” In it, I described a five-step process that helps. Specifically, I suggested:
- Identify what makes them difficult or aggressive.
- Find out why they are acting that way.
- Be firm and principled.
- Develop a good Plan B.
Don’t sink to their level. I would also highly recommend Bill Ury’s classic bestseller Getting Past No: Negotiating in Difficult Situations. His proven strategic framework is also described in my 2001 column “When Emotions Stop the Talks, It’s Time to Stand Back.”
2. Use hypotheticals in the offer-concession stage
Trading offers and counters back and forth can lead to very positional tit-for-tat bargaining and spiral downward in counterproductive ways when dealing with adversarial negotiators. This can be especially problematic if your counterparts have significant egos.
So what tactic will work effectively in those contentious and often high-pressure situations?
According to University of Amsterdam researchers Diyan Nikolov Grigorov and A. Francisca Snoeck Henkemans in the Negotiation Journal (and summarized in the Harvard Negotiation newsletter article “In Aggressive Negotiations, Hypothetical Questions Can Unlock Value”), “asking questions is one of the most effective ways to demonstrate genuine curiosity about a counterpart’s position, uncover essential information, and ultimately craft stronger agreements.”
But asking questions is just a first tactical step. As my longtime readers know, effective negotiators ask at least twice as many questions as others.
But you should also craft the right type of question, especially when making offers or proposals. Hypothetical questions, according to Grigorov and Henkemans’ research, can be particularly powerful. They note:
“hypothetical questions include a condition or presupposition that encourages the listener to take your point of view, such as ‘Would you be able to go any lower if we waived our delivery fee?’ or ‘If we moved back the closing date, would you be willing to pay for the house to be painted?’ . . .
“Because the hypothetical implies an idea that can be easily revoked or disavowed, it may allow us to engage in aggressive negotiations while still being perceived as cooperative and flexible.”
By doing this, and also by couching your proposal as a “what if …” proposition, the offer or counter will likely be more appealing to your counterpart than a simple counteroffer or contrary position.
Another way to accomplish this same goal is to counter by giving your counterpart two options that you find equally acceptable. Ask if they prefer A or B, giving them the power to choose. This can be particularly effective with aggressive negotiators.
Which would I recommend – hypotheticals or equally valuable options? I like both equally well, so you decide!
Latz’s Lesson: Difficult negotiators often present difficult challenges. Try my strategic five-step approach and counter with hypothetical questions or equally palatable options.
* Marty Latz is the founder of Latz Negotiation, a national negotiation training and consulting company that helps individuals and organizations achieve better results with best practices based on the experts’ research. He can be reached at 480.951.3222 or Marty@LatzNegotiation.com.